Today, 19th my birthday, I should be happy. But this year is different. Something is missing, or rather someone important. I looked forward to my birthday since last month, thinking we could finally spend time together. Maybe or should I say hoping you'd be the first to wish me, hoping for a card like the past years. I expected so much and this is how hard I fell. I don't know how I should be feeling now. It doesn't really matter to you I supposed. Birthday? It's just another day. Here I am, crying my eyes out. Fuck, I really hate myself so much. For being a fool, checking my phone every few minutes with little hopes dangling & every time I die a little inside. Old habits die hard, at least to me.
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